My god is too small.
I do not have a theological problem. I have no trouble affirming the God of the Bible, especially as revealed in Jesus.
I do not struggle to assent to an infinite, all powerful God; this is not an intellectual problem.
My problem is a belief problem. What I truly believe is indicated by my actions and when I observe my behavior, I must confess that my god is too small.
My god is too small when:
- I look to others to define who I am and how I am doing
- I am overwhelmed by my circumstances
- I feel that no-one understands me
- I get bogged down in guilt
- I let my failures define who I am
On the flip side, Scripture reveals the character of God and speaks to all of these issues. For example:
- Psalm 139 tells me that I am fearfully and wonderfully made and that I am not a mistake. God determines who I am and how I am doing (Psalm 139:14).
- Jesus promises to be with me (Matthew 28:20) and is in control of my circumstances.
- Jesus is the Wonderful Counselor (Isaiah 9:6) and understands me
- In Jesus I am under no condemnation (Romans 8:1)
- Scripture presents every giant of the faith as having experienced failure. Their failures did not define them or keep them from being used by God.
If I truly believe these things, I will act upon them. When I am caught in the first list, it is evidence that I am not believing in the God of the Bible. At that point, the god in which I believe is too small.
Thankfully, I can echo the prayer recorded in Mark 9:24, “I believe; help my unbelief!” A prayer from which I have taken much comfort over the years.