A victim of friendly fire

Posted on September 5, 2012 Written by Mark McIntyre 1 Comment

The rejection

It has been said that the church is the only army that shoots its wounded. Not only have I been in situations where this has been true, sometimes the church caused the wounds in the first place. I have been the victim of friendly fire and have observed others who have been targeted by those who should have been their friends.

I have seen friendly fire incidents take place in situations where someone is ostracized because he doesn’t fit the mold of the church he has joined. The offense could be something as innocuous as being socially inappropriate (as the group sees it), being too needy, being too outspoken or having a bad reputation. I have seen genuine, God-fearing believers rejected for superficial and un-Biblical reasons.

The result

Jesus said that it would be better to jump off a bridge with a millstone around your neck than to cause someone to stumble in faith (a loose paraphrase of Matthew 18:6). Jesus takes this type of rejection very seriously and those who practice it will certainly be called to account.

If we are called to love our enemies (Matthew 5:44), certainly we should be able to find in our hearts the ability to love those who merely annoy us, especially if they are Christians. We do not have the luxury of putting out our brothers or sisters just because we do not like something about the way they go about life.

To be rejected by fellow Christians hurts far worse than any rejection by a non-believer. We expect that our atheist neighbor might have a strong dislike for our faith. We understand that our non-believing coworkers will think us odd for going to Church. What we don’t expect is that Christians would ostracize other Christians. To the pain of rejection is added the pain of betrayal, for rejection by other believers is exactly that: betrayal.

I have experienced this type of betrayal and it is difficult to recover from it. The wounds are deep and all the more painful for being unnecessary. One of the lingering effects of this woundedness is a reluctance to be open and honest, even in a healthy, supportive situation.

The response

I encourage church leaders to conduct as many exit interviews as possible to find out why people have left your church. In some cases they left over preference issues (style of music, available programs, etc.), but sometimes people leave for more troubling reasons. If people leave because they do not feel welcomed or accepted, you have a serious problem.

Yes, there are some Eeyores out there that will never be pleased no matter where they go, but these are few. Do not allow yourself the luxury of thinking that everyone who feels left out or complains about things at your church is doing so because he has a critical spirit and will never be pleased.

Take the feedback seriously and learn from it. You may find that the reason that these people annoy you is because they highlight an area in your life which God wants to change.

Do not initiate a friendly fire incident in an attempt to avoid dealing with your own issues.

On the need for a heart transplant

Posted on September 3, 2012 Written by Mark McIntyre Leave a Comment

The heart of stone

It would seem to me that the depravity of man should not be in question given our track record for violence, greed, selfishness and prejudice.

The problem is that as a result of the rebellion in the garden, we have been damaged. This damage affects our thoughts and emotions. As a result, we cannot respond to God properly without his grace being poured out to change us.

If you acknowledge this as true, then the functional question then becomes “what can be done about it?”

In two places in the prophetic book that bears his name, Ezekiel diagnoses our problem by telling the nation of Israel that they had hearts of stone:

“And I will give them one heart, and put a new spirit within them. And I will take the heart of stone out of their flesh and give them a heart of flesh,” (Ezekiel 11:19, NASB)

“Moreover, I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; and I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh.” (Ezekiel 36:26, NASB)

If we are honest, we will admit that apart from the work of God in our lives, we possess hearts of stone that cannot respond properly to God or to others.

Behavior modification doesn’t work

Too much of the preaching I have heard over the years boils down to behavior modification, pray more, read more, give more, complain less . . . etc. To tell someone what to do without giving them the tools to do it is foolishness.

Real change cannot take place without the Grace of God working in us to transform our hearts of stone to hearts of flesh. Apart from the Gospel of Jesus Christ being operative in my life, I have little hope for real, sustained change.

Preaching to the heart

This is why it is imperative to proclaim the gospel at every available teaching opportunity. Without the transformation that results from a relationship with Jesus Christ, change can only be external, superficial and perhaps temporary. Therefore preaching that does not first proclaim that transformation will only result in external change.

Paul tells us that we require transformation by the renewing of our minds (Romans 12:1-2). From birth, our thoughts and emotions are tainted by the rebellion in the Garden. Our minds and heart (thinking and emotions) are in need of realignment.

The call to repentance

Therefore, the beginning place of preaching needs to be a call to repentance. The call to daily repentance can be seen in Jesus’ command for us to daily take up our cross (Luke 9:23). It is only after we correctly identify the source of our struggle that we can begin to apply correction. Jesus, when he began his earthly ministry, began by saying

Until we come face-to-face with our sin and have it dealt with at the Cross, we cannot truly begin to have a heart of flesh and deepen our relationship with God.

Oh, to have a heart of flesh that is in constant communion with God. One day . . .

Grace and sovereignty

Posted on September 1, 2012 Written by Mark McIntyre 1 Comment

It’s a big world

As I am flying on a business trip I am struck by how big the world is and how many people there are in it. So far today I have been in two airports on my way to a third and I have seen thousands of people. Seeing all the lights of the city reminds me of how many millions of people are going about the business of life below me.

I suppose it is normal for each of us to want to make his mark on the world. We want to leave a positive legacy. Yet, few of us really get to influence large numbers of people.

As church leaders this is no less so. Setting aside the danger of pride in accomplishment, there is something positive about wanting to reach large numbers of people with the Gospel. Jesus wants us to do this.

The task is too big

But, even in a small town, this task can be overwhelming. We cannot reach everyone. We cannot exert as much influence as we would like. Not everyone responds to the message. Unless you live in a very, very small town, it is physically impossible to reach everyone with the good news.

So how do we keep from getting burned out or overwhelmed with the enormity of the task? This is where a proper understanding of the sovereignty of God comes into play. We are not called to do more than God gives us to do.

According to their ability

In the parable of the talents, Jesus tells us the story of a man who called his servants to him and gave them talents with which to do business until he returned. Matthew 25:14 tells us that he gave the first five talents, the second servant two and the third servant received one talent. Jesus further tells us that these were distributed according to their ability.

The story illustrates that we can only do what we’ve been given to do. The expectation of profit for the servant with five talents was much higher than the servant with one. So it is in real life. God gives some a greater sphere of influence.

But, too often those of us with one talent compare ourselves to the one with five and succumb to feelings of inferiority and failure. We have to keep in mind, that the standard of judgment is faithfulness in what we’ve been given to do, not the numerical result.

Rest in God’s sovereignty

So, if you are a pastor of a small flock, enjoy the flock that God has given you and remain faithful in your call. If you are a small group leader, Sunday School teacher, youth worker, nursery attendant or parking coordinator, serve and be confident of God’s approval if you are being faithful to your calling.

Yet, in that confidence, we also need to be open to God’s leading us into something bigger and more challenging. But, for us to achieve the desired result, the bigger challenge must come at God’s prompting and not our own grand design.

It is a big world, but God has not lost track of all the billions of people in it. We can be confident that his plan for humanity will not be thwarted and all we have to do is be faithful where we are while being open to the idea that he may choose to use us in a bigger way than we ever thought possible.

Do they feel welcome and will they come back?

Posted on August 30, 2012 Written by Mark McIntyre 2 Comments

Do they feel welcome?

While our ultimate goals is to bring people into relationship with Jesus, a mediate goal should be to get them into our community. In other words, church attendance is not the final goal, but people who attend church are more likely to become disciples of Jesus Christ.

If a person off the street happened to come into your church service, would they feel welcome and would they be likely to come back?

Music?

Is your music something that the average non-churched person can identify with? We are not called to follow every whim of the music market. But I do think that we are called to present worship in a way that someone from the surrounding culture can understand. The goal is not perfection or virtuosity, but the worship must be genuine. Do your visitors see that the worship is genuine? Is the style of music off-putting?

Teaching?

Do you present Scripture in a way that someone with no Biblical knowledge can understand? The gospel does not need to be modified or watered down, but it does need to be proclaimed in a way that can be understood. The Apostle Paul is our example in this. Paul used Scripture when speaking to Jews and quoted the Greek poets when speaking with Greeks. He used language that his hearers could understand to present the unchangeable truth of Jesus Christ.

Fellowship?

Are you glad to have visitors? If so, do they sense this when you greet them? If someone looks like they’re struggling to figure out where to take their kids, do people recognize this and point them in the right direction? Do you have people available to answer questions about the church? I have visited churches where I was not sure if any knew I was a visitor or cared if I ever returned. This should not be the case.

Questions?

Do you provide a forum for non-believers or new believers to get questions answered? Do you welcome questions? Or do you give the false impression to your guests that everyone else in the audience is in the know? We all struggle with doubts and questions from time to time. Can we be honest about this with our visitors and provide a way for those doubts to be addressed?

Let’s not play church

If we are not sensitive to the needs of new or prospective disciples then we are failing in our mission. We cannot afford to play church, we are called to be the church. The church is to be a gathering of the redeemed who are active in God’s mission to reconcile the world to himself. If we settle for the church as a social organization we settle for less than what God would have us be.

Jesus told us that the defining characteristic of the the church is to be love. In short, if someone visits your church and does not sense love, then you have failed.

The only proper response to failure is repentance and resolution to do better.

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