It is one thing to know about grace, it is entirely another to live as if grace is real. I was reminded today of the many ways that I have chosen to live as if I am not under the grace of God.

Sure, I know I don’t deserve God’s grace, and I know he freely bestows it on all who ask in the name of Jesus. But yet I often choose to live as though this is not true. I beat myself up for my failures and live as though God is angry with me even though He has promised his forgiveness.

In reflecting upon this, an old hymn came to mind:

1 Marvelous grace of our loving Lord,
Grace that exceeds our sin and our guilt!
Yonder on Calvary’s mount out-poured–
There where the blood of the Lamb was spilt.

Refrain:
Grace, grace, God’s grace,
Grace that will pardon and cleanse within;
Grace, grace, God’s grace,
Grace that is greater than all our sin!

2 Sin and despair, like the sea-waves cold,
Threaten the soul with infinite loss;
Grace that is greater– yes, grace untold–
Points to the Refuge, the mighty Cross. [Refrain]

3 Marvelous, infinite, matchless grace,
Freely bestowed on all who believe!
All who are longing to see His face,
Will you this moment His grace receive? [Refrain]

Hymnary.org

Yesterday I read the words of Jesus in John 6:29:

“This is the work of God—that you believe in the one he has sent.”

John 6:29, CSB

When I doubt God’s grace and love for me, I am failing to do what Jesus calls the work of God. I am choosing to disbelieve in spite of the evidence. This the Bible calls sin and the remedy is repentance.

A good friend called me out on this today and while it is hard to hear how my choices have hurt others, I realize that I can ask forgiveness, seek restoration, and trust that God will accomplish repair in me and in those I have hurt by my unbelief.

I’m taking baby steps toward a new freedom in Christ.

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Anyone who is old enough to have gotten past middle school has had or currently has someone in their life who is a critical voice. Perhaps it is a boss who uses putdowns to “motivate” his workers. Maybe the critical voice is from a parent or other family member. Teachers and fellow students might be ones that have harmed us by their words.

While we have been taught to quote the proverb, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me,” honesty requires that we admit this statement to be false.

Words can and do hurt.

Further damage occurs when we start to believe and act on those words. When we encounter lies said about us, we need to renounce them as lies and cling to what is true.

Yesterday, my Bible reading plan took me through the opening verses of Psalm 119 where I read this:

“Open my eyes so that I may contemplate wondrous things from your instruction.”

Psalm 119:18, CSB

As Christians, we believe that the Bible is God’s revelation to humanity and gives us a proper understanding of how He views us. Therefore, it is important to read the Bible to allow us to gain a proper perspective on who we are and what we should be about.

At times, I can read the words without allowing them to penetrate the lies that have accumulated around me through the years. But when I allow myself to be amazed, when I allow myself to see “wondrous things,” then my Scripture reading helps me see who I really am as a Christian.

But I need help to do this which is why the verse quoted above is a great prayer before reading the Bible.

Oh, how I wish the prosperity preachers were right. Life would be much more enjoyable if everyone who came to faith in Jesus had a life free of conflict and difficulty.

But they are not right and we have been promised neither happiness nor comfort in this life. In fact, Jesus told his followers that they were sure to have trouble (John 16:33).

One of the benefits of getting older is that we can gain some perspective on how God has used the difficulties to shape us into who we were designed to be. If nothing else, the difficulties show us how little control we have and how dependent we are upon God. None of us is guaranteed so much as our next breath.

But God is not a codependent being who needs to be needed so our struggles must be more than simply a reminder of our need of God.

Paul tells us in the opening verses of Romans 5 that somehow our troubles are used by God to build hope in us.

“Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. We have also obtained access through him by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we boast in the hope of the glory of God. And not only that, but we also boast in our afflictions, because we know that affliction produces endurance, endurance produces proven character, and proven character produces hope. This hope will not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured out in our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us.“

Romans 5:1–5, CSB

Paul tells us that we can boast in our afflictions because they produce endurance, character, and hope.

An analogy of a sculptor comes to me. To accomplish what he envisions, the sculptor needs to chip away the pieces of stone that hide the beauty of his creation. Chip by chip, the features of the work of art are revealed to both the sculptor and the world.

It is not a fast process. It is not an easy process. And only the sculptor knows what will be revealed when the process is complete.

Perhaps this is why Paul told the Ephesians to give “thanks always for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ” (Ephesians 5:20, CSB).

We can be thankful for even the hard things because God is using them to make us into what he designed us to be. The sculptor is chipping away the pieces of us that are contrary to his design.

We can submit to the process and be grateful, or we can shake our fists at the heavens in resentment and cursing. Moment by moment the choice is ours.

It’s a presidential election year in my country so the candidates and the news outlets that support them are ramping up the rhetoric about how bad things are and how much worse they will get if the wrong candidate is put in office.

Just listening to the “news” can cause anxiety. Even as I write this, I am reminded that they intentionally cause anxiety to give the impression that we need to listen to their opinion as to how to fix things.

On top of all this, and at the risk of sounding like an old geezer who looks back to the “good old days,” it seems there is a general sense of decline in stability, both moral and cultural. Some days, I see problems everywhere if I look close enough. This can be overwhelming and discouraging.

But this morning, I read Psalm 104 as part of my Bible reading. While reading it, I was reminded that God is still in control. God set this planet in motion and it will stay in motion until it is time for him to bring history to a close and renew Earth to its original design.

So, my suggestion for myself and anyone who reads this post is to take a deep breath and read Psalm 104 whenever life in the 21st Century seems to be spinning out of control.

“May my meditation be pleasing to him; I will rejoice in the Lord.”

Psalm 104:34, CSB