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Attempts at Honesty

Reflections on the interplay of the Bible and Culture

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Confessions of a man-pleaser (idol worhipper)

Posted on August 8, 2014 Written by Mark McIntyre 1 Comment

Golden Calf IdolI could blame it on the church of my youth. We Evangelicals are often big on external conformity and not-so-big on dealing with the heart.

I could blame it on personality. One of the curses of being sensitive to the thoughts and feelings of other people is that it is easy to become overly concerned about how they are responding to you.

Or, I could just face the fact that I am an idolater at heart and have made an idol out of the approval of others.

While there is some truth in the first two excuses, ultimately they are just excuses. It is possible to grow up in legalistic Evangelicalism without becoming a people pleaser. It is also possible to be sensitive to others without making their approval an idol.

Now, I’m certainly not saying that it is wrong to be sensitive to what others are thinking. Someone who takes no feedback from the people around them is by definition a sociopath. If you have ever known a sociopath, it is not pretty.

But the point is that the feedback from others has to be subjugated to a proper understanding of who God has made and called me to be. It is his voice that needs to be preeminent, not the voices of the people around me.

I find it easy to make this distinction intellectually. I find it rather difficult to put it into practice. The transition from people-pleaser to God-pleaser has not been an easy or a short one for me. In fact, comparing my progress to a drive from New York to San Francisco on I-80, I feel like I am somewhere around Stroudsburg, PA. Even now, while I am writing this blog post, I am overly concerned about what people might say about it.

The good news is that I am in a church that consistently points me to the Gospel and how the Gospel speaks into every aspect of my being, including man-pleasing. I am an idolater, but a forgiven one who has power available to him to be something better. This is the first church that I have ever attended that was successful in breaking through to me with this message.

I think that at least one other church tried to do so but I was not prepared to receive it at that time. Too many of the churches I have attended were content to give me a list of rules which did not challenge my man-pleasing but instead reinforced it. We Evangelicals are oh so good at rule keeping which dulls us to the real condition of our hearts.

So, while I value your opinion, I am learning that it must not prevent me from being what God wants me to be. I must not conform where God does not want conformity. I answer to God and God alone.

Bold words perhaps, but increasingly true in my life by the grace and power of God.

Filed Under: Commentary Tagged With: idol, idolator, man-pleaser, Worship, worshipper

Submit a question or topic to Attempts at Honesty

Posted on August 7, 2014 Written by Mark McIntyre 2 Comments

QuestionI would enjoy hearing from you if you have a suggested topic for a post or if you have a question about the Bible or church life. You can use the contact form on this blog, or you can enter your question or suggestion in the comments section at the bottom of this post.

I don’t offer this because I am an expert, but to stimulate discussion. The goal of the discussion is to arrive at a Biblically accurate viewpoint on the topic at hand allowing for legitimate disagreement where Scripture is not absolutely clear.

I’m looking forward to hearing from you with questions and suggestions.

Filed Under: Commentary Tagged With: question, suggestion

It has the ring of truth . . .

Posted on July 18, 2014 Written by Mark McIntyre 3 Comments

Ring of TruthOne of the things I enjoy about reading the Bible is how real the characters are. With the exception of Daniel and Jesus, we read stories of men and women who were seriously flawed but were used by God to bring about his will for humanity.

Moses had anger issues. Jacob was a conniver and a dad who played favorites among his children. Joseph flaunted his favored position over his brothers. David was an adulterer and tried to hide his sin by committing murder. Elijah won a great victory on Mount Carmel and then experienced depression and withdrawal from society. Peter, oh how I really appreciate Peter, would open his mouth and say the dumbest things. Saul, who became Paul, persecuted the church before he was converted. These are some of the better known stories, look at any Bible character and you will see greatness and folly juxtaposed.

Several responses come to mind when I consider the presentation of these flawed characters.

  1. The flaws support the veracity of these stories. They seem to be true accounts with no varnish or cleanup, they have the ring of truth. Why do I suppose that the flaws point to the truth? It is because when I look at myself and the people around me, we are all a similar mixture of greatness and folly in differing proportions. These characters seem real because we can point to episodes in our own lives or those of the people we know where the same flaws have been displayed (OK, so I don’t personally know any murderers, but I have known some adulterers). Like Peter, I can be praising God in one breath and then saying something incredibly stupid in the next. I can catch the wave of elation as I see God work in someone’s life and then be overwhelmed by the ever presence of evil in the world.
  2. I am encouraged by the admission that my forebears in the faith were all flawed. The fact that they were flawed did not nullify their usefulness to God, nor did it diminish God’s reciprocation of their love. Certainly, their final standing with God is dependent upon repentance and response in faith to God, just as it is with all believers through the ages. But I am comforted by the fact that moral failure was not the means of disqualifying them from receiving grace. In fact, in some cases, failure was the means God used to move the one who failed into deeper relationship. Think how Peter must have felt while having breakfast with Jesus on the shore after the resurrection. Bitterly aware of his failure, Peter discovers forgiveness and purpose for his life moving forward.
  3. Like all good stories, the struggles of the characters force me to take a hard look at my own failures. The fact that these stories are true makes them even more poignant. These stories act as a mirror when we read them and they reflect back to us the areas in which we struggle to live in love and truth. Who can read the story of Jacob and not feel ashamed of his own attempts at inappropriate manipulation of his circumstances?

We are at the same time deeply flawed and deeply loved. Sometimes these are hard to reconcile, but both remain true. The good news is that we can make progress toward being less flawed, even in this life as Jesus brings cleansing and growth.

It may be slow progress, but any progress is a win.

Filed Under: Commentary Tagged With: flawed, Scripture, stories, Truth

Share your favorite Bible Verse

Posted on July 15, 2014 Written by Mark McIntyre 6 Comments

Update: Attempts at Honesty is no longer using Livefyre or Sidenotes for comments. This change was made for several reasons; the main reason is the negative effect Livefyre had on page load speed. Also, Livefyre limited commenting to those who are willing to create a Livefyre account and Livefyre controls all the comments. I’d rather have the control within my own domain.

LivefyreIn the spirit of testing out the new commenting system, I thought I would challenge the readers of Attempts at Honesty to use the comment system to share their favorite Bible verse (you can have more than one).

Please leave a comment in the box below that tells us your favorite verse and why it is your favorite verse (what it means to you). For those who are reading this post by email, the title of the post is a hot link that will take you to the post on the web where you will be able to add a comment.

I’m looking forward to hearing from you. We will all be encouraged by your responses. Also, I would ask that you share this post with others to solicit their responses. It is always fascinating to me to hear how God’s Word speaks to people.

Filed Under: Commentary Tagged With: Bible, comment, verse

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